Brown's personal dungeon master (a parody of Igor and Sméagol), who appears in 'Cubing A Round', 'Tort(illa) Reform' and 'There Will Be Oil'. Brown usually disapproves of his loose grip on reality; for example, in 'Cubing A Round' he spends $1,500 on a Swiss mechanical steak cuber using "the little plastic thing with the numbers on it" (a credit card).